meximick's Diaryland Diary

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Teach Me How.

When I heard what had happened, when I first felt the impact of what had happened, my first thought was "Who do I know that has a car? I have to get out of here."

My head hurts from thinking about everything that's happened. I never realized that the New York offices for my company were all located in the World Trade Center. They've accounted for all but about 20 people. I didn't work closely with anyone there, and the people I do know are all ok. The security at the Chi Mercantile Exchange is tight - there are only 2 places on Monroe St. to enter and exit.

I want to be away from here. Right. Now.

I want to think about something else. Anything else. But I can't.

I never thought running off and hiding in a cave would be the answer in dealing with the amazingly senseless, brutal moments of life. Now it seems like the right answer.

I know I'll feel better someday.

I know people will pull together and overcome and rebuild.

I know we will drop bombs on people.

I know people will eye Arab-Americans with increased suspicion.

I know there will be more terrible, heartbreaking stories to be told, and desperate cell phone calls transcribed.

I know that giving in to this feeling I have in my heart, the feeling that tells me to give up, that if I hide far enough away from everyone and everything, that I won't get hurt, is to give in to the terrorists. This is what they want.

But I don't know how to not be scared.



In Better News: They just found 2 firemen alive. I hear shouts of joy on the radio report from the WTC.

lovemeximick

11:33 a.m. - 2001-09-13

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