meximick's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I�m no longer going out with the girl. In the middle of our long and drawn-out breakup conversation, wherein I said not a lot, I asked her if it was that she didn�t see me in her future. Eventually she said, yes, she didn�t see a future for us. She changed. I used to be comfortable for her, but not any longer. Does that mean she outgrew me? Looks like the four year difference caught up with us. Fuck, I�m at times as immature as a stupid punk teenager, but not often. I�m getting better at life, I really am. Seeing the importance of responsibility, taking initiative in my life. But I just got dumped because it wasn�t enough. She made up her mind some time ago and �had been meaning to say something�. I didn�t say very much other than ask if there was something I did? She blamed it on herself, for the most part. She decided the relationship was not worth pursuing any longer. I�m not feeling terribly awful now, just really let down and bummed. Maybe it was the 1 day cushion, or writing here at 1 am last night. Maybe I see her point. I know I needed some change. From her. From me. I pray I find someone as accepting and great as her someday. And hot. I liked impressing people I knew with a hot girlfriend. She always took that poorly, that people were impressed with my girlfriend�s looks. That she made me look better. Made her feel like people thought I wasn�t good enough or something. But it was true. 3:44 p.m. - 2003-03-11 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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