meximick's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Stupid problems I do not feel good about the situation with me and my neighbor. Hooked up w/ her on Friday. She said things like she liked my touch, and she liked it when I held her. This is no good for me. This sounds bad, but I don't so much want a girlfriend at this point in my life - I don't want her as a girlfriend. She's nice. She also smokes an ounce of pot a week, which is fine with me! She also doesn't mind an occasional toot of coke, which I'm not such a big supporter of. And now when she pops in, or we see each other in non-duly-designated hookup situations, I see that as the conversation wraps up she moves her head kind of toward me and downwards - looking for a kiss that I just don't want to give her. I sound like an asshole, but this situation got out of hand quickly, and I'm as much to blame as anyone and as I write this I am horrified that this is what my fucking diary has become?? When I started this thing, I didn't want to be revealing intimate aspects of my life, even though there are tens of thousands of other diarists at this site alone who do just that. It's just not my thing. I usually write random, stupid shit not because I think anyone reads this - its mainly to make myself laugh. ANd oh my God, that woman from the news office just walked by - the one who never says anything to me - has a great ass! Now I think things like that written in a diary are funny. And also very, very true. So I have to have the "I like you as a non-sexual friend" conversation with this girl very soon. Actually it's more of a "I like you as my non-sexual drug dealing neighbor" conversation. So many questions - phrasing - how should I put it to her that I'm done, well, 'putting it to her'? I'm definitely going to wait until she scores us some smoke, just to cover my bases, but once that is accomplished - timing - when do I bring it up, and will it be better if we're both very high, or just her, or just me? Maybe I should ask Ann Landers how she would approach this situation. Maybe I should take my neighbor on the Rikki Lake or Queen Latifa show. I think a public forum is the perfect venue for such a sensitive issue. 14:20:16 - 2000-08-21 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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