meximick's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- The eternal question: Dolemite vs. Shaft Whats up diary? Have you cleared up that little coke trafficking charge the pigs were trying to pin on me? Mad ups to you for that. So the other night I was out shooting pool (that's the latest term for smack) with some friends, and I offered to buy the "next round". I know I haven't gone out in a while, but when the check came, I wanted to pull out my hair and abuse myself in an way my mom told me not to. For one pitcher of beer and 2 shots of tequila it came to $30 american dollars. And we were at a pleasantly lit dive of a bar, it's not like we were at Hooters or anywhere real high class. So after I stopped browbeating and shreiking at the waitress about all of the bar's 'hidden fees' (and the microchip in my penis), I paid the bill. I also went to see "Bring it On", which actually whipped a donkey's ass. It was 90 solid minutes of simple, mindless fun; a true family favorite that little girls as well as their pederast fathers will surely love! And I tell you there must have been some subliminal messages scattered throughout that film, because I am now compelled to worship Kirsten Dunst by wearing the skins of those who have wronged me. Weird, huh? Oh, and I had "that talk" with my pothead neighbor. I was sober, and she and a girlfriend came home, stumbling drunk, asking if i wanted to smoke. As I cannot usually stand to live soberly in this toilet world, I accepted. She brought up the fact that she had not seen me in a week, and of course I told her how busy I had been, what with my daily diary entries - yes I blamed it on you, Diary, you needy whore! After the pipe was passed, and her friend went to make a phone call, it turned into the sincerity-mocking cliche/lie/uncomfortably high hour. Actually it was about 20 minutes, but it felt like a day... ...a day in a P.O.W. camp, beaten with rattan canes and bamboo shoots shoved under your fingernails, and you scream out in a sickening combination of abject pain and sheer terror, "Aaaagghh. Dear God yes I denounce America. It sucks hard like my mom. Noooooo!!!" And then she told me that she needed some time to get over her 'disappointment'. And I was disappointed too. Because she probably won't score us anymore drugs. Fate, she is a cruel tramp, no? Now everyone say it along with me: love, m 20:10:28 - 2000-09-05 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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